Too much and not enough..

I guess since this is my blog, that gives me the right to rant and rave the things that are going on in this moment. Right now is just a crazy crazy time in our (me and my family) lives. I’m trying to work from home, which has it’s ups and downs..The first down is that I’m not in the office of the person that I work for, which seems to make her forget to PAY ME. I know that I need to be patient, because she’s waiting on money from the contractors that she’s “subbing” under, and so there’s “no money” for her to pay me. So I just keep biting my tongue, and my lip, and all of that, and waiting..and waiting..and waiting. So going back to the title..this one is Too much work, not enough pay..

The second thing that I’m trying to work out is that the work that I have, even if I was getting paid, could end at any time, and due to this wonderful “OBAMAnation” that we live in, it’s not looking like there’s going to be any hope of any architecture work coming my way any time soon.  So now I’m trying to decide on going back to school or not. Well I guess I have made my mind up that I do want to go back to school. I’ve found that the Lord has blessed me with the ability to design some bands artwork for CD’s and Myspace pages and such, but I would like a little bit of schooling under my belt to help me with the web side of things. I can draw pretty pictures in photoshop all day long, but if I don’t understand the way to put them on the web the way that I want them, what use is it?? So as for now I’ve applied and been accepted to two online schools, Art Institute of Pittsburgh, and ITT Tech. I’ve also checked out just today the American InterContinental University. I’ve got a friend that is going there, hoping that she’ll be able to give me some incite since she’s taking the same exact class that I’m looking at. It’s cheaper and a bachelor’s degree instead of just an associates…hmm..So this one is Too many choices, not enough money..but I guess that’s what loans and grants are for..

The last one is just something that’s frustrating. I work from home, but I just sometimes feel bad cause I am here, yet I can’t spend time with my family. I know I’ve gotta get work done, but it’s really tempting to just go hang out with them and do nothing. I also feel bad cause there are times that I get really involved in one project or another and my kiddos will pop their cute little heads in the door where I’m at and I’ll just tell them that I’m too busy and to go play. Then when I’m done with work, I still don’t take the time to really play with them..ugh. Too much selfish..not enough being a real dad..THIS ONE I REALLY NEED TO FIX.

I guess in the long run, I should do what I know I need to do which is to seek God and His infinite wisdom, and experience, and learn how to better manage my time, and figure out exactly where He wants me to be and what He wants me to do. I have learned (through my pastor) that I need to just seek God to seek God, not for just selfish motives like “Where am I supposed to be??” or “What should I be doing?” but just look at Him in His glory and magnificence and just love Him. It’s so amazing how God will take my silly rants and raves on here and always correct me while I do it. He’s so awesome. Sometimes you just need to “see it for yourself”.. Thanks Lord. Maybe I should re-label this one. Too much ME..not enough JESUS..

Upgrading is so much fun..

Every once in a while there’s an upgrade for wordpress..which i gracefully do..usually. I went in today to change out my wife’s blog, only to find out that I have to upgrade the MySQL.. and let me tell you. THAT’S NOT FUN. I just thought I’d make mention of this, so maybe my wife will read this and appreciate it 🙂

Living Sacrifice “The Infinite Order”

Living Sacrifice “The Infinite Order”’s so crazy. I’ve been waiting for a while for this new album, even since I posted the interview with Lance from LS. Yet, patiently I wait, only because I know that it’s SO worth every second. Well, once again, they prove me RIGHT. They have now posted 2 songs from “The Infinite Order”. The first song called “Rules of Engagement” got downloaded by me the same day it showed up and now “Nietzsche’s Madness” is up and all I can say is wow. Simply amazing. I haven’t laid down the cash for the pre-order yet, not that $10 isn’t worth it. Of course it’s going to be. I’ve just been waiting to get some money in.

I also found a contest that is offering a chance to win tickets to a show, plus a t-shirt and a “back stage pass” or at least a chance to meet them, not that they don’t come out and talk to everyone anyway. Anyway, I hooked up my myspace page to show off their new album. Oh yah, it comes out January I think you should buy it. I’ll repost my interview with Lance in the next few weeks coming up to the release..and who knows, maybe I can get a hold of something to give away..we’ll see..I guess I’ll need to get back out there and get some people to my site..

Till we meet again..

Been so busy

It’s so crazy how busy you can get even when you don’t have constant work. I’ve had contract work here and there, and even worked for a weekend at a Christmas tree lot. It’s amazing what God does to provide. The best news that I’ve heard in a while though is that my cousin (who’s like a brother to me) accepted Christ this past Sunday. I’m so happy for him. I know that making that decision will be a major point in his life and that the testimony that he has can only be used to glorify God from what he’s been pulled out of!! Thank you Lord!

Butterfly Nebula

Butterfly Nebula

So I saw an update somewhere that was talking about new pictures from the Hubble telescope. I thought I would share some of this with you. It’s one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen. The description (see below picture) just made it that much cooler:

Butterfly Nebula

A beautiful view of a star in its death throes is featured in a gallery of images sent back by the Hubble Space Telescope after its final shuttle servicing mission in May 2009. The planetary nebula NGC 6302, better known as the Butterfly Nebula or the Bug Nebula, is about 3,800 light-years away in the constellation Scorpius. The features that look like dainty butterfly wings are actually roiling cauldrons of gas heated to more than 36,000 degrees Fahrenheit, blasted away from a dying star bigger than the sun. This picture was taken by Hubble’s Wide Field Camera 3.”

I was blown away by the fact that the temperature was 36,000 degrees!! That’s just amazing. Seriously.

Beyond all of this, just looking at the picture and reminded of God, and what he can do. Just as this star dies, it looks like a butterfly, a new creation. Like in 2 Corinthians 5:17 it says: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

In that phrase, the word “BEHOLD” really sticks out. So what’s the definition you may ask:

transitive verb

1 : to perceive through sight or apprehension : see
2 : to gaze upon : observe

intransitive verb —used in the imperative especially to call attention

We are to not just become a new creation, but we have to realize and call attention to the fact that we are a new creation. To show others that we are. To be an example to those who haven’t “died” yet.. That’s my blurb of the day 🙂


I thought I’d take the time to type out a message that I passed on to the kids (youth) at the Upper Room. If you don’t know what the Upper Room is, it’s a Christian Venue in Statesville, NC. You can go look here. Anyway, back to the point. I was asked to share a brief moment, which is usually reserved for a band member from one of the bands or groups that plays at there that night. Well I was asked to speak, and had time to prepare, so I started preparing! Amazing..I know, well here’s what came through in the end. There were a few different versions, and the last one happened about 5-10 minutes before stepping on the stage. I took with me 2 CD’s, a roll of duct tape, masking tape, a sharpie, and a hammer. I used part of a message that was on the radio earlier that week (obviously not coincidence) but I reworked it for the message I was bringing. I started talking about how we as Christians are like the reflective side of the CD. We can reflect the Light, and that’s our job, to reflect THE Light. We are not ever called to be THE Light, but just the reflection. We could never reach that point to be able to do that, which is great. I don’t want that kind of responsibility, but I’m more than willing to do my best to reflect.

I then took the duct tape and tore off a few pieces and placed it on the back of the CD’s and wrote out “Jesus Christ” with the sharpie. This is to represent the fact that we as Christians are called to show and represent (and reflect) Jesus. It should be seen. (Reference 2 Cor. 5:17) We are to be a new creation in Christ, old things become new. People should be able to SEE the difference in our lives. How we act and react to EVERYTHING.

Then came the “stuff” as I refered to it…I took a piece of masking tape and put it on the hammer and wrote “stuff” on it. It represents all of the junk, crap, and stuff that comes at us and against us in the world to try to break us and make us conform to the world and care about all of it’s “stuff”. Well if you’ve read this can figure out that the hammer met the CD. It broke and dented and looked horrible, but it didn’t fall apart. It even had a crack all the way down the middle, but because of duct tape (aka Jesus) it didn’t fall apart. You (the CD) may be a Christian, and you may have stuff that comes at you that will try to beat you down and try to break you apart. You may have bruises and “cracks” to show that you’ve been through the fight, but if you keep a hold of your “duct tape” (again..aka Jesus) you can come through.

Then came the other CD. It represented the person who does not have Jesus Christ. It had a sticker on it, like a label, which would represent false religion, or just relying on yourself. Then came the “stuff”. The hammer came down, but this time it busted into a ton of pieces. The “label” did absolutely nothing. It tore in two and just fell apart with the rest of it. That’s how it works in real life, you hold on to your good thoughts or your other type of false religion or anything else other than the real thing, and it will fall apart. It may help you have some happy times, but it will never bring you Joy. Joy is something that can’t go away.

It still doesn’t end there…there’s still broken pieces. Well then I picked up all the broken pieces with one piece of duct tape, showing the fact that no matter how broken or beat up we could be from this world, Jesus Christ can come in and take that, AS YOU ARE, and heal it and fix it. He’s not looking for you to do it on your own, He knows that you can’t do it..and that’s ok. He will work on you and heal you from the inside out.

So if today you are reading this, and have questions about this, just know that Jesus Christ came to this world to find the broken and beaten down and take all that upon Himself, a sinless man-God, and died for this world so that one day we can have eternal life with Him in Heaven. All we have to do is tell Him we’re sorry for what we’ve done and ask Him to take full and total control of our life, and then GIVE IT TO HIM. That’s the beginning. Then you need to get into a bible based church, and get around bible based people and read the bible (I sense a theme hear).

Oh..and one more amazing note, the next day I got a message noting that someone heard all of that and accepted Jesus Christ as their Savior from this world!! Amazing! Please also note that this was nothing of me, I am just a mouthpiece for God, led by the Holy Spirit. Amen.

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